Date with Ikea

The timeline has been altered.

I was working under the assumption that any potential split and move would happen later in the spring. For many reasons, none of which are all that interesting, it just doesn't work out well to move before, say, April. But the decision was made to split and my future ex-wife wants it all done as soon as possible. Pressure has been applied, logic be damned.

This last week in clinic was slow - too slow, actually. Makes me nervous about having enough patients to justify having a job. But it did allow me to leave work early and explore the vast wonderland of housing in Vancouver (Motto: "Just like Vancouver, BC, only without the Olympics. Or charm. Or diversity. Or nightlife. Or ferries. Or skyline. Or Canadians"). Mostly what I found was horribly depressing. For my hoped-for budget I could select from a number of complexes chock-full of presumed meth users. Oh! A 400 sq. ft. studio in downtown in a secure building...for $700. The living space is the size of my current dining room. Ok then, here's a 1 bedroom with a fireplace, cramped but bigger than most and...huh...what's that smell?

I looked at about 12 places and found 2 that would meet my basic criteria: be cheap enough to not have roommates, be safe enough to have my kids stay with me. Not fancy places, but acceptable. Friday I stumbled upon one nicer community that was running a ridiculous special on a single unit. A couple hundred a month less than normal. It's close to my office, close to shopping, close to the freeway that takes me back to Portland and the kids. Gated complex (for no good reason). Pool. Hottub. AC. Big balcony overlooking a large greenspace. W/D, microwave. Vaulted ceilings. Covered parking. The apt is close enough to the clubhouse to let me steal their free WiFi. It's the biggest place I saw by a lot, and I even got a rent discount for working at the hospital.

I had to take it, even though I was hoping to slow down the divorce train. I suppose it could still fall through, but it appears to be a done deal. I'll be leaving sooner than I thought and sooner than I hoped. I'll have the place mid-Feb, be out by early March I'd guess.

I have to now figure out what I'll be taking and what I'll need. I haven't lived alone, or in an apartment for that matter, since '96. I came to this relationship with nothing. Everything I brought to LA from TX I shipped UPS. The FE-w is hoping to rent out the basement (finished, and currently the kids play area). I'll get that furniture: sofa bed, coffee table, another table for dining, entertainment center, big TV. I'll get the daybed I've been sleeping on and a dresser. But that's about it. I have to start over. Create a functional life - an adult life this time, and do it on a limited budget if possible. It would be nice if in the process of being a consumer whore I managed to pick out stuff that didn't say to visitors: this guy is one step away from living under the bridge in a dishwasher box.

So today it was off to Ikea.

I generally like the place, even enjoy the Bataan Death March they force you to undergo to get to the department you actually want to see. And I think I'll be able to cobble together a kitchen (plates, anyone?) and fill in the odd furniture gaps on the cheap (bedside table, etc.). But I found the experience bittersweet. Virtually everybody in there seemed to be cute young couples starting off on their experiements in cohabitation. 25, holding hands, getting amped over that EKTORP sofa and what do you think, honey? The MARKÖR or the HOLY SHIT I LOVE THE RAMVIK!!!!!

That was me a decade ago, cruising the Carson, CA store, picking out floor lamps and bar stools. And what good did all that do me? I'm back again doing the same thing but without the joy and without the promise. Didn't see a lot of single guys in there. Didn't share telling looks with other 30-something men starting over. Maybe I don't understand my demographic. Maybe I'm supposed to be resupplying someplace else. Army surplus? Bass Pro Shops?